Hot potatoes...seen anyone with a chip on their shoulder?

KEEP YOUR EYES PEELED: Missing potatoes Wikipedia

POLICE are urging people to keep their eyes peeled for cheeky green-fingered thieves who stole one-and-half-tonnes of potatoes from a field near Basin Road in the village of Outwell - a few miles from us just over the county border in Norfolk.
Hundred of spuds were dug up from the same area only three weeks ago under cover of darkness but it is not clear if the two crimes are linked. Such dastardly deeds.
There are no description of the villains, who are unlikely to be couch potatoes, but we should presumably be looking for people with chips on their shoulders. Could they be golfers with that sort of handicap. Chip and run, perhaps? This sort of crime is quite common in the Fens, folks. Bring back the Peelers ...http://www.learnhistory.org.uk/cpp/met.htm

ALEXANDER the GREAT

BBC

PS: So the royal baby will be known as George Alexander Louis. Congratulations to William and Kate. A future king is born. How appropriate then, that another great Alexander - James Alexander Gordon (right) - the king of football results, should announce his retirement from the BBC at the age of 77. Those of us interested in sport grew up with him as he gave us the news about our favourite team every Saturday in that posh Scottish accent. He had one of the most recognisable voices in broadcasting and read the classifieds for 40 years. Sadly, JAG recently had surgery to remove his larynx after being diagnosed with cancer and his voice is no longer strong enough to broadcast. 
Mark Pougatch, multi-talented presenter of Radio 5 Live Sport, summed it up for all  fans when he said: 'Such was his unique style of reading the classifieds, his wonderful inflections and stresses, that even non-believers of sport knew the result after the home team's score.
'Nobody else will be able to say "Wolverhampton Wanderers" with such mellifluous tones.'  


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T&Q stay so cool at fiery Fenland HQ

WHAT'S UP, DUCK? T&Q are playing it cool in the heat

HOT OFF THE PRESS:
Why do ducks watch the news?
To see the feather forecast!

REMEMBER those cute little yellow things who/which hatched almost four weeks ago (see previous posts) at Fenland HQ? Tich and Quackers have grown slightly, wouldn't you agree? They now overshadow mum when they stand tall, they are very inquisitive, they eat exceedingly well and are quite noisy in a whistly sort of way. In fact, they are bordering on being mini hooligans, albeit tame 'uns.
As soon as we put food out, they appear out of nowhere, rocking from side to side like a couple of Keystone Cops. They don't corner that well but they most definitely eat for Britain.
We bought yet another coop last week because they were growing so quickly it was apparent there soon wouldn't be enough room for ducklings and surrogate mum - the black Pekin called Rosemary. Fortunately, all have settled well in their new abode.
Furthermore, they share a pen with the other two bantams and all get on famously. The feathers are not flying.
Maternal Rosemary initially stepped in aggressively if the others seemed to be getting too close to her babies, but she quickly realised they were not a threat to T&Q so she dropped the rolling pin, took off the boxing gloves and the status quo was restored.
The heatwave - talk about extremes - doesn't seem to bother T&Q too much. They are taking everything in their clumsy stride and either drink from or stand in the trays and containers of water in their compound. The Met Office continue to issue obvious warnings about the hot weather while the rest of us swelter, but T&Q remain cool dudes throughout it all. It seems nothing can ruffle their feathers (which are just beginning to appear).

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PUT IT ON THE BILL: The gang inspect the newly-purchased
 home (top); Rosemary and her babies stay in the shade